August 6, 2012

vacation nation

Summer is here, and with it come the Southwest ding alerts, excessive booze consumption, and me pretending to give a shit about the Olympics. Alas, it's also the time of year to delve into a great American tradition: The summer vacation. Your summer vacation spot says a lot about who you are and what you prioritize in life. Allow PWeekly to provide some keen insight into what your destination of choice says about you deep down. Real deep. The deepest.

Tropical Island
- You fear no food borne disease (and enjoy the occasional shart).
- You wouldn't be mad at illicet sex with a stranger. (See also: A dolphin).

Theme Park
- You have overweight children.
- You are likely insane.

- You seek socially acceptable venues to placate your outrageous drug use.
- Ironically, being homeless doesn't appeal to you.

- You consider carb loading an Olympic sport.
- You don't mind sleeping in a bed the size of a squirrel's vagina.

- You look horrible in a swim suit
- You are literally the worst type of human being.


Sarah said...

OMG Yes! I ate at least 5 pounds of fries on the last cruise I went on.

Anonymous said...

LOL @ Staycation. Very true!

Anonymous said...

I can't handle theme parks either.

Vicki said...

Damn you! I am NOT the worst type of human being!